It’s “the place are you now?” month at Ask a Supervisor, and all December I’m working updates from individuals who had their letters right here answered previously. Listed below are 4 updates from previous letter-writers.
1. I don’t need to be pied within the face for work
Thanks once more for the response to my letter and state of affairs. It was very nice to see that I wasn’t unhinged for pondering it wasn’t acceptable to be pied within the face, and also you had some excellent recommendation relating to not needing to be a high performer to be exempt from humiliating work affairs. It’s one thing I would definitely imagine for others, however not for me—so I wanted the fact test that I may rely myself within the “nobody needs to be pied within the face in the event that they don’t need to!” class. The commenters had been additionally fairly type and I actually did respect the solidarity from most people.
My replace isn’t very thrilling past excellent news, which is I’ve moved on from this office earlier than something got here of the pies. This was simply the tip of the whipped cream iceberg of a foundational mismatch between me and different managers on the earlier place. I’m a lot happier now that interactions like that one aren’t my each day norm.
I’m unsure if the pies are nonetheless taking place, however we will solely hope that whether it is, it’s opt-in, not opt-out. I opted out extra completely. 🙂
Cheers for the recommendation and good intention!
2. My coworker made a creepy cross at me (#2 on the hyperlink; first replace right here)
I’m a non secular reader of AAM and love replace season. I assumed you all may get pleasure from one other replace on my state of affairs with Mac. I can’t imagine it’s been over a 12 months!
Mac by no means mentioned something sexualizing or out of line to me once more. We by no means received again to the type of simple work friendship we had beforehand, however issues had been cordial and whereas not essentially heat they weren’t chilly both.
Sadly one thing finally got here out that possible cements his feedback as much less harmless than he portrayed them in his apology: he was having an affair and his spouse is divorcing him. He’s moved out of the neighborhood and now not works right here, which I’m grateful for. This new growth undoubtedly made it more durable to imagine he didn’t know precisely what he was doing along with his feedback.
Thanks once more for opening my eyes final 12 months and to all of the commenters that helped me discover my gumption. I nonetheless can’t imagine I pulled that line with a straight face, and it nonetheless feels superb that I did. And thanks for all of the knowledge and leisure over time! Can’t wait to maintain studying extra.
3. Are these interview pink flags? (#3 on the hyperlink)
Thanks, Alison and the commenters, for giving me a intestine test. Shockingly, the day after I wrote to you, I heard from HR that they had been continuing with placing collectively a suggestion for me, and requested for my references. HR instructed my references that they had been giving me a suggestion, and let me know that every one the evaluations of me had been glowing and the group was actually enthusiastic about bringing me on.
After you posted my letter, I used to be occupied with withdrawing my candidacy, however determined that having the knowledge on what compensation they’d provide me for the position was value having, so I deliberate to hold in there till that time, once I may decline. Nicely, the joke was on me. For one more six weeks I stored being instructed that the provide was forthcoming, delayed for numerous approvals (it was with management, with the brand new CEO, with the dad or mum firm). Lastly I known as HR after two weeks of radio silence and requested for an replace. At that time they instructed me that they may not in truth be giving me a suggestion in any case, as a result of the hiring supervisor had recognized another person they had been now excited by and wished to interview. I thanked them for his or her time and the next Monday withdrew from consideration. The complete course of took 4 months, and I by no means as soon as heard from the hiring supervisor or the group, the whole lot was run by HR (yet one more big pink flag).
The method was eye opening in its personal proper and a very nice reminder that if an organization treats you badly and is a whole mess in the course of the hiring course of, it may possibly solely go downhill from there. Thanks to the AAM group such nice perspective!
4. Speaking with a group that doesn’t learn e mail (#2 on the hyperlink)
As a few of the commenters accurately guessed, administration wasn’t a superb match for me. I made a lateral transfer to a non-management position on the similar group. I’m making the identical amount of cash (nonetheless, uh, not loads) however I’m MUCH happier in my new position and I’ve every kind of concepts for enhance my little nook of this place!