Thursday, July 25, 2024

open thread – Might 24-25, 2024 — Ask a Supervisor


Just a few years again I took a contract that I used to be very enthusiastic about. It was for a corporation who “embedded” their groups with the shopper, so I had no visibility into the top shopper once I accepted the function. That mentioned, from my first contact with the shopper, “Ken”, issues had been off from the primary name, when he provided to rent me away from the corporate I used to be working for (he didn’t know me / non-compete / bizarre). My crew met with Ken daily for hours; he demanded to have a number of hours in calls with us, which ranged from him rambling about private issues to ranting and even swearing at us, however he didn’t give clear course. The embedded crew would spend time after the conferences decompressing from these torture classes with the shopper, who got here throughout as fairly unhinged and irrational at occasions, altering his thoughts and altering course ceaselessly.

I’ve ADHD (and nervousness), I’m open about it, and so I respectfully requested to have schedule a couple of breaks within the calls (which had been generally 4 hours). The bizarre tangental communication and hours of zoom depth had been a LOT. However Ken took offense at this and introduced it as much as his supervisor, my supervisor, and his supervisor’s supervisor as an issue with me. From that time, I grew to become a goal for his wrath. I used to be depressing for months. My crew lead on the challenge, “Barbie”, would complain in regards to the shopper with the remainder of us, however by no means provided any help to me on the challenge as I struggled to know what the shopper wished and likewise struggled together with his rages and swearing. I lastly requested to be faraway from the challenge when Ken went off on me about IT points (which had nothing to do with my function) and complained about me to his boss — and his boss’ boss — with regard to mentioned IT points (I used to be not an IT individual and on no account was that my function). My PM mentioned that everybody was conscious of how Ken was treating me, but no one did something to assist, and I used to be a contractor, so no one actually cared.

After my contract ended, I used to be emotionally gutted from the bullying and verbal abuse and it took me months to search out one other job. I sunk right into a deep and scary melancholy for many of the following yr. However I lastly bought one other job, I’ve supportive coworkers, and I’ve been in a greater place.

As I’ve been slowly reconnecting with the world, I reached out to a couple of the coworkers I appreciated from the earlier function on LI, and I occurred to see that Barbie had written a GLOWING, multi-paragraph evaluate about Ken on LinkedIn, about what an amazing {and professional} individual he’s and the way a lot she realized from him and the way superb he’s. But…..that was not anybody’s expertise on the crew, and he or she had complained about him alongside everybody else.

I don’t know why, however this has shaken me. Barbie was conscious of the continuing verbal abuse I endured from Ken, was within the conferences, and had even commented on it. But regardless of that, Barbie determined that he’s an exemplary human being. I really feel gutted. I really feel gaslighted. I do know that is so weird of a response, however I’m struggling to see how the crew lead who ought to have supported me in essentially the most devastating skilled state of affairs I’ve skilled selected to publicly write a letter of help for this nightmare of a human being. I may use some reframing assist.

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